I got back yesterday evening from Brussels, completely exhausted. Aside from the few hours of sightseeing I did on Sunday, I worked the entire time. Monday and Tuesday were both 13+ hour work days and then Wednesday was a 13 hour travel day back home.
Normally I would have taken a few hours each day to do some sightseeing, but since I was traveling with my boss I pretty much had to do what he did. So most of my time was spent looking at a computer screen.
I did manage to go to the tiny hotel gym both Monday and Tuesday morning (4 mile run on Monday, elliptical and upper body lifting on Tuesday).
On Wednesday morning, I woke up early to run my scheduled 6 miler before my flight home. I got dressed, went down to the gym, and started running on the treadmill….and stopped after 30 seconds. As you all know, I’m not much of a treadmill fan and I was so exhausted that I could not get myself to do it. So I went upstairs and relaxed until we left for the airport.
This morning I woke up in my own bed and hit the familiar streets of my neighborhood for my run. I didn’t even bring music. I watched the sun come up and felt great. I’m very happy I didn’t force myself to do a sh*tty run on the treadmill. I finished the six miles @8:53 min/mile pace.
Traveling with my boss got me thinking about work-life balance and the culture at my company. I have always felt that there is an expectation that everyone should work long hours at this job. The boss that I was traveling with does not have a wife or kids, and in conversation I can tell his job is probably one of the most important things in his life. He’s a very wealthy and successful man, but I know that is not for me. At least in this job. I’m certainly not passionate enough about the work to make it my life.
I work to live, not live to work. My job is the reason I can go on vacations, eat healthy foods, buy clothes and visit my friends. But it’s pretty low on the totem pole of what is important in my life. Don’t get me wrong – I like my job and it’s by far the best job that I’ve had since I graduated (I worked at 2 other companies before this one). It challenges me intellectually. But it’s hard for me to see how my time here will play out when I know I will always put my life outside of work before my job.
In fact, I started to feel a little under the weather today. I completely attribute this to lack of sleep and too much work, so I came home to work the rest of the day here. Note: I didn’t take a sick day, because I feel guilty about taking a sick day at this job. Isn’t that ridiculous? I did take a long break to walk the dog though. How could I resist that face?
How important is your job to you? What is the culture like at your company? Do you live to work or work to live?
I’d like to have a job that I’m really passionate about, but the one I’m at currently isn’t it. I do agree with the work to live thing because I do like eat well and have enough money for fun, but I would love to LOVE what I do and have it be fulfilling.
This is such a great topic that I can’t talk about on my blog right now. What do you do? I think I left a comment asking before but didn’t come back to see if you answered. I am actually not working right now because I was so miserable where I was. Like unbearable unhappy and dreaded going each day for many many months. So I am deciding what it is I want but do think I will always agree that work leads to means for a quality life and life will always come first. I have been interviewing a lot and am in the waiting period. I’d love to talk more about this because my friends here don’t really get it or think too much about it.
I do opinion research – so we do focus groups and surveys for Fortune 500 companies. I like the work but not the companies we work for (so I’m helping companies I’m not very fond of get richer). I think I would be happier doing the same work for a non-profit or a company I love.
I think that is so brave of you to take the risk of quitting a job you hated. What kind of jobs you are looking for?
I’ve only been at my current job for a little less than 3 months, so I am not exactly sure what the culture is. I definitely don’t live to work but I often wonder if that’s because I don’t have a passion for what I do.
Great job on the run, btw.
I definitely work to live. Though I can understand how people can caught up in work either because it’s their passion or if you don’t have something outside of work, you start to let your career define you. That’s why I love blogging and the whole healthy living community (plus my non blogger friends) because it keeps me from becoming completely engrossed in my career.
I’m glad you took a work at home day to semi rest especially after all that traveling and running. You definitely deserve a break!!
I agree that having a blog really helps. I often wish I had a career in the “healthy living” field, but then I wonder if it would stay as fun, know what I mean?
I definitely would have to say I work to live, especially with the job I am currently at. Let’s just say things are less than good and I often think about how it’s time to make a change. I can relate to your experience though because in my old job, my boss was similar to the man you traveled to Brussels with and I found myself engrossed in my work which I was really passionate about.
It’s important to talk about this though, especially as you think about family life and what is truly important in life!
For me, it’s become live to work at the right times and work to live at the right times.
I’ve been fortunate to work for a great company for 13 years…we are #1 in our field and the expectation is very overachiever give give give, especially if you aspire to become a partner, which I did. You don’t get the spoils of being the best without putting in the work so I happily lived to work for the first ten or so years. I bet I was your boss but wearing higher heels
I did make partner, but realized I didn’t have any friends, never went on vacation, children were out of the question (to be fair, not a big priority for me to start with but once you get past 35, options start to narrow) and I had stopped doing things I loved like fitness and cooking and travel. Part of why this was possible is that I met my future husband when we were young 20s; we didn’t get married until we were 30, but that part of my life was not missing, which I know is something that challenges many young women trying to balance career and life. A few years ago, I started taking back my after-7 pm and weekends and found that it actually made me better at my job. And I think it was a better model for the team of professionals I lead, who are a mix of older/younger than me. They know that leaving at 6 for something important to them is not going to hurt them in my eyes, or they don’t resent it if I leave to run when they are still working.
It looks like all of you figured this out much sooner than me, so enjoy it!
Do you think you would have made it as partner if you hadn’t worked all those hours in the beginning of your career though?
can’t wait to see that cute face tomorrow!
I’ve been feeling some of the same stress lately too. Some say it’s just part of working for a start-up, but it’s REALLY REALLY hard to fight for work-life balance. And my opinion is that if I don’t do it now, I’ll never be able to change it. Good on you for being aware!!
Welcome home! Glad you didn’t force the run
I used to have a prestigious “dream job”.During an outbreak a few summers ago, I worked 16 hour days for 13 weeks, weekends included. Not for me. I had to quit. I somehow found a job doing what I’m truly passionate about, and my work situation could not be better. Like you, many other things are much more important to me than work!
That seems to be the key – finding something you are passionate about. That is awesome.
Reply to comment above–I want to stay in general marketing but for a better company than where I was basically. Use my skills of web marketing, event planning, sponsorships, etc. And a hospital or wellness place would be even better. I’m in the waiting period now.